Disillusioned Love Page 5

  “I think he likes you too.” Riana smiled.

  “Then it’s a deal. He shall take us around downtown.” Alex asserted firmly with a quick nod. He turned to smile at Riana and she, too, nodded in agreement. “Now, what’s the proper way to do this?” Alex questioned. “Do I get in first and help you up or stand by and lend you my hand?” Riana laughed quickly, but when she saw how serious he was she wished she could have prevented the laugh that had escaped her.

  “Sorry.” She deplored with a quick scrunch of her nose. “How about, you get in first and I’ll follow?”

  During the hour and a half ride around downtown Riana and Alex talked endlessly. Alex was in complete disbelief that he had stumbled upon such an amazing person. “I just can’t believe you were able to turn so much torment into something so...powerful.” Alex expressed as Riana dug deep to give him the raw story of her past and how she came to be an author and speaker about it.

  “I guess I had no choice. I’m not exactly the type to stand idly by and let outside events dictate my life journey.” She thoughtfully chewed her vertical labret. “From the very beginning I fought it all, but in different ways. First I fought him, I fought the legal system, then I fought to be normal. Just when I thought life could move on I had to fight the second, I fought to heal, then I fought for other victims. Now I use my drive to fight for those who haven’t experienced assaults, but are immersed in the hidden rape culture of our society that makes such disgusting things possible. I fight to educate. I was truly blessed with an ability to articulate things well, explain things in a way that people get it, and blessed to personally connect with people. I couldn’t let that go to waste.” She looked over at Alex and grinned. “Much like you didn’t let your God-given musical talent go to waste.” She winked.

  Alex was thankful for his dark skin again as a slight blush warmed his cheeks. He questioned what it was about her that flustered him so much. “Oh, not even a close comparison.” Alex reached his arm up and behind Riana to pull her into him. “I didn’t need to go through such a personal hell.”

  “Ah, well, life goes on.” Riana murmured modestly. “And hey! I’ve met your fans. I’d venture to say that dealing with them could very well qualify as a personal hell.” Riana looked up at Alex and giggled.

  Alex laughed deeply next to her. “Touché, my dear.”

  Matthew glanced at the clock in the bottom right corner of his laptop screen and sighed when he saw it was already 1:15am. Alex had been with Riana for over four hours. Alex hadn’t called, and Matt didn’t want it to appear like he was checking up on him by calling, but he couldn’t help but wonder what Alex and Riana were up to. He knew Alex would never cheat on Kim, but he could also see something between Alex and Riana that placed a small whisper of doubt in his heart.

  Just as Matthew pulled his phone from his pocket he heard the hotel door open. “Well hi.” Matt greeted as he turned his head over the back of the couch.

  Alex gave Matt a goofy grin as he flopped down next to him. “What are you doing up so late?” Alex asked.

  “Oh, not much, watching movies, surfing the web, you know, the usual.” Matthew quickly rambled.

  “Ah. Waiting up for me.” Alex laughed.

  “I...certainly was...not.” Matthew defended. As their eyes met they both laughed. They knew the truth. “Yeah, okay, fine. So what did you and Ri end up doing for four hours?”

  Alex’s face softened and he smiled. “We took a carriage ride around the city, talked, got ice cream, talked, walked around, talked. We did a lot of talking.” He laughed. “We are most definitely keeping in touch after we leave.”

  Matthew smiled back at him as he got up and patted his shoulder. “Good.”

  Chapter Five

  Where’d You Go

  Sunday May 28, 2006

  It was D.M.A.’s last day in Chicago and Alex wasn’t faring well with it. He should have been happy to head home, Kim was going to visit him in New York that upcoming weekend, but he had become so sucked into Riana’s story, life and spirit he had a hard time imagining not being surrounded by her energy. “She is coming right?” Derek asked as they waited for Riana to meet them for lunch. They picked the historical Atwood Cafe as it was placed strategically in the middle of downtown, with plenty of opportunity to people watch.

  “Of course she’s coming, D. She just called Alex and said she’d be here in about five minutes. Order another drink and relax.” Matthew advised with a slightly annoyed sigh. Alex kept his eye down the street and watched for Riana. As he saw her round the corner he couldn’t help but light up. “Ah, see, she must be coming.” Matthew laughed as he quickly noticed Alex’s change in appearance. Alex couldn’t help but laugh as Riana shuffled her foot back into her heel after it slipped off as she tried to run. She looked up towards the cafe and she, too, lit up. Riana continued a half jog until she was about ten feet away, her face was flushed and her forehead was dotted with bits of perspiration. She pursed her lips and let go of a heavy breath.

  “I. Am. So. Sorry.” She huffed as she reached the table. Derek was the first one out of his chair to wrap her quickly in his arms.

  “No problem lady.” Matt assured as Riana was passed to him.

  “I may not have known you for long dear, but, I think you may have a problem with punctuality.” Alex teased as she finally fell into his hug. He laughed deeply as she sighed against him.

  “You sir, are right.” She confirmed as she pulled a seat out and took her place between Alex and Derek. Riana knew it was selfish to feel the way she did, but she didn’t want the guys to leave yet. It’d been so long since she’d connected with anyone the way she’d connected with all of them; especially Alex. She spun her vertical labret ring around as she churned everything in her head.

  She half listened to Derek and Matthew carry on about hitting the studio when they got back to New York. She glanced over at Alex. His strong chin rested in the palm of his hand as he watched Derek and Matt. Riana reminded herself of boundaries and the fact both she and Alex were quite seriously involved with other people. He was beautiful though.

  “So when does your book tour start?” Derek shook Riana from her daydreaming. “Maybe we’ll intersect again.” Riana grinned brightly at the idea of being able to see them while she was on her own tour.

  “The plan right now is to hit the road in eighteen days.” She raised her eyebrows in mock nervousness. The truth was, she was dying to get on the road.

  “Pretty sure the world won’t know what hit them.” Matt laughed as his blue eyes squinted against the sun beams that broke through the skyscrapers.

  “Exactly.” Riana winked as she took another sip of her iced tea. “So you guys will be recording for a while then? Should I call when I’m heading to New York?”

  Alex turned to look at her, with an exaggerated look of offense on his face. “Um, of course!” Riana grinned around the straw in her mouth, happy to know it was expected of her to let them know if she was ever nearby.

  Tuesday July 18, 2006

  Riana attempted to pack her suitcase in her hotel room in Philadelphia when she heard and all too familiar ring come from her cell phone on the dresser. She stuck her tongue out at the misbehaving suitcase and hopped over to pick up the phone. “Hey Alex!” She smiled.

  Riana had been on the road for five weeks. She worked her way from the west coast to the east coast. She had hoped to start east and work west so she could stop and see the guys right away. The tour had been amazing. She met so many wonderful, inspirational women—and men. She knew she was finally on her way to change the world.

  Alex made sure to call her fairly often, every other day or so. Sometimes, when she was lucky, she’d get to talk to Matthew and Derek. She had decided early on that Alex was a bit of a “Riana hoarder.”

  Things between Riana and Ryan had unfortunately gotten worse since she started the tour. It helped her immensely to be able to talk to Alex about it. Lexi and Samantha were over-protective of Riana a
nd held a lot of resentment towards Ryan. Alex, though, listened to Riana intently, kept any negative opinions to himself, and supported her in how she felt. It helped tremendously that he could relate to so many of the issues she faced with Ryan.

  “Hey lady, what are you up to?” Riana loved Alex’s voice. His deep and happy voice.

  Riana groaned, “I’m attempting to convince my suitcase that yes, all my belongings will fit in there. He apparently doesn’t want to listen to me.”

  “He?” Alex questioned with a full laugh. Riana knew he was probably sitting somewhere, shaking his head at her.

  “Of course!” She exclaimed. “It couldn’t possibly be female, a female would never give me so much attitude!” The way Alex made Riana laugh was more genuine than most of her laughter; rivaled only by laughter shared with Lexi and Samantha. Alex brought out a laughter in her that siphoned the joy of life from all around and inside her and allowed it to burst through.

  They continued to chat about her tour and how things were going in the studio with D.M.A.; all the while Riana was distracted. She tried in frustration to figure out the physics of packing. Surely if it all fit on her way to Philly it should fit on her way out of Philly. “So, next stop is New York. You guys going to be around to catch dinner?”

  “Absolutely!” Alex boasted without any attempt to disguise his enthusiasm. “I kept Thursday open for you.”

  “Oh, how nice of you.” Riana teased. “Will

  Matt and D be keeping their schedule open as well?” She twisted and wrapped two shirts together and barely squeezed them into a tiny corner of the suitcase as she precariously dragged the zipper across the tight seams. “A ha! You little bastard!”

  “RIANA!?” Alex’s voice called out in bewilderment.

  “Sorry Alex, I just conquered the suitcase.”

  Riana explained.

  Alex laughed whole-heartedly at her. “You are the best. I can’t wait to see you Thursday.”

  Thursday July 20, 2006

  The time that passed between when Alex got off the phone and when he got ready to meet Riana for dinner went painfully slow. Even at times when he was sure the time had to have flown by, he would find the clock seemed to have gone backwards.

  Derek kept a watchful eye on him and never allowed Alex to forget about Kim. Alex couldn’t understand; he could never forget about Kim. He loved Kim, she’d been with him through so much. It wasn’t that Alex was losing sight of his love for Kim, it was that Riana brought a light to him; a craziness and a joy he thought he had lost.

  Alex knew it was rare to find friends who understood their crazy schedules and lives. So for them to have found Riana, someone with her own crazy schedule; their natural friendship couldn’t be passed up. Their conversation the second night in Chicago summed it up well; sometimes other people just don’t understand they simply couldn’t be there. Riana and Alex both understood phone calls, texts and online chats had to be enough when it wasn’t possible to physically be there. What saddened Alex was the man Riana loved didn’t seem to understand the dynamics of such a hectic schedule. She put up with so much from him, she always took what little he gave to her but the moment she wasn’t able to give him everything he expected, all hell broke loose.

  “Come on, seriously, let’s go!” Alex yelled down the hall to Matthew who was deep in his diva ways, getting ready for dinner. Often times Matt was worse than a high maintenance woman when it came to getting ready.

  “Calm down Alex,” Matthew muttered nonchalantly as he strolled down the hall. “I mean seriously, we don’t have to be there until--” He glanced down at his watch as he entered the living room. “Shit, we have almost ten minutes to get there.”

  Alex’s eyes grew large and indignant. “Like I said!” He yelled as he grabbed his keys from the granite countertop in the kitchen and stormed out of the condo.

  Riana took another sip of her Asti and glanced at her watch. She pursed her lips in worry. “Relax sweetie, they’ll be here.” Lexi assured as she patted Riana’s leg.

  Lexi, as a freelance editor, had freedom most people only dreamed of. It provided her with opportunities to travel with Riana, volunteer with organizations close to her heart and pursue passions that would otherwise be unobtainable. Riana hadn’t told Alex Lexi would join them, she loved surprises and thought it might qualify as a good one.

  As Riana went to take another sip she heard them, “I swear Matt, if she left because we’re late, I’m kicking your ass.” Riana smiled, stood up and went to meet them in the middle.

  “Now, now, no need for violence kittens.” She teased. All three of them lit up as they saw her. She was all business in her flattering yet professional pants suit with sequin tank under a modern cut black blazer. She gasped for air as she was suddenly wrapped in an Alex sized bear hug. She sighed when she found he smelt more delicious than she remembered. “Hey buddy.” She mumbled against his chest; that strong, warm, comfortable chest. She quickly chastised herself, the only man she should find delicious and comfortable was Ryan. Alex released her and she turned to Matt and Derek. She felt love in each of their embraces. “I’ve missed you guys.”

  “Us too.” Derek echoed as Riana led the three of them back to the table where Lexi waited. Everyone else’s dinner was quickly interrupted when Derek shouted out in surprise when he saw Lexi. Riana looked around with a smile and a touch of embarrassment when she saw annoyance on the faces of other patrons. She quickly ushered the guys to their seats.

  Seeing Riana and Lexi together was an absolute joy for the guys. They created their own little world between them, those lucky enough to be invited in like Matt, Derek, and Alex got to experience joy and happiness that stood the test of time. They were beautiful together; Riana and Lexi. Their friendship and love brought a light to them that could only be created through authenticity. They found joy in each other, comfort in their understanding, hope in each other’s dreams. They’d always been there for each other, no matter what. That kind of devotion couldn’t be falsified and it was inspiring to witness.

  Riana enthusiastically told them about the book tour, mostly of the people. Anyone could see when it came to what she did, it had nothing to do with her, it was all about the people she could touch with her story. There was a massive sense of selflessness to her, she didn’t care if she made money off any of her books or speaking engagements. If she could help bring peace, hope, or comfort to anyone that’s what she’d do for the rest of her life. Alex’s admiration for her grew immensely as he listened to her, and watched her. She beamed with pride, not in herself though, for the people who she had helped to find their voice; the people whose first time breaking their silence was to her.

  “I can’t believe we did it again!” Lexi laughed. Derek looked around and realized the place was practically empty. Alex looked down at his watch and realized once again, they had talked all the way to closing. Some things never seemed to change. That was the thing with people like them, with crazy lives and schedules, they couldn’t seem to break away from the moments in which they truly felt understood and appreciated. They shuffled around and gathered their belongings to leave. The serving staff watched them in thankfulness. The staff hadn’t dared interrupt and tell them to leave, it would have been in poor taste to be rude to people of their caliber.

  Alex draped his arm over Riana as they walked out and into the thick summer air of New York City. “So how long until you think we’ll cross paths again?” She asked.

  “That depends.” Alex replied simply. She looked up at him with her brow wrinkled. “How much longer are you here?”

  “Saturday. I planned for a slightly longer stay here.” She grinned proudly.

  “Hmm.” Alex pursed his lips and feigned contemplation. He didn’t have to think about anything specific, he just enjoyed making her wait. “Would you and Lexi like to come by the studio tomorrow and watch some magic happen?” He winked with a wiggle of his heavy, yet beautiful, black brows.

  Lexi giggled bes
ide them as they stood on the sidewalk. “Oh you are dirty!” Riana squealed with a playful swat to Lexi’s arm. She turned her attention back to Alex. “Yeah, we’ll come watch some magic making goodness. Give me a call tomorrow.”

  Alex began to wonder, as he laid in bed that night if maybe Derek did have reason to keep a cautious eye on him. He couldn’t escape the thought of Riana; her smile, her laugh, her passion, or her sweet scent. He thought maybe it was because it was new and exciting, or maybe because he hadn’t seen her in so long. However, there was a quiet murmur of something beneath the friendship. Alex vowed not to mess it up, not his friendship with her, Lexi, or Sam. He definitely didn’t want to ruin things with Kim. He was lucky to find someone he could relate to so well, and felt comfortable with. He would do whatever he could to keep it, without messing everything else up in his life.

  Friday July 21, 2006

  Riana pulled into the lot of the building D.M.A’s recording studio was in and Lexi shook her head in disbelief. “Seriously Ri, how many times did we dream of being exactly where we are right now?”

  Riana looked up at the imposing building and laughed lightly. “Oh, I don’t know, about a hundred times a day for at least three years straight.” She found Lexi’s eyes and smiled. “I tell you though, it’s better than I ever imagined. You know how sometimes you build something up in your mind, or expect people to be a certain way and then you're inevitably let down?” Lexi nodded. “So not what happened with these guys.”

  As they entered the building and stepped into the elevator Riana checked her text messages quickly to find out exactly where they were heading. “Alright, so apparently if the red light is on above the door we’re to just wait a minute.” They exited the elevator and anxiously walked down the rich blue hallway that was decorated with pictures and records of musicians past and present.