Disillusioned Love Page 7

  “Yeah, Alex, I don’t think we should force her to wake up just to get her to the place where she can go to sleep. Seems counterproductive.” Matthew commented. “We’ll see you when you get back home.” Alex gave Matt a small smile. Alex then gazed back down at Riana. She looked younger, and incredibly sweet curled up with her hair wisped across her forehead and cheek. Alex squatted down and slipped his arms under her knees and her shoulders then pulled her to his chest as he stood back up. Riana gave a slight murmur as she snuggled into Alex’s chest. He became acutely aware of how heavily his heart pounded and wondered if she could feel it too. He took a deep breath and reminded himself, again, to shove anything deep beneath the surface. He left Derek and Matthew in the studio as he followed Lexi out to the parking lot.

  “This was such a wonderful day Alex, thank you again so much for inviting us.” Lexi gushed as she walked along with Alex. “I know Riana loved every minute of it too.” She grinned at Ri nestled securely in Alex’s arms. Alex, too, gazed down at her.

  “My pleasure, Lex.” Alex assured as they got to his car. Lexi quickly unlocked the doors and opened the passenger side for him. Alex gently placed Riana in the seat and reached across her to do her seatbelt. Riana took a deep breath, attempted to burrow into the seat as she turned her body toward the center console. Alex backed out slowly and closed the door as quietly as he could. He watched the dome light dim over her. It left her illuminated only by the yellow lights scattered through the parking lot. He turned back to Lexi. She had an odd smile on her face. “What?” Alex asked as he nervously looked anywhere but her eyes.

  “Nothing.” She grinned. “It’s just surreal you know?” She paused. “Yet, it seems so completely normal.” Alex nodded.

  “I know what you mean. Don’t let D fool you though, he’s far from normal.” He teased. Lexi laughed and playfully pushed Alex.

  She thoughtfully licked her lips and narrowed her eyes on Alex. “Say Alex?” She wrinkled her brow and contemplated how to continue. “That song, you know the one when you were at the piano, something about waiting on the sideline?” Alex’s eyes grew a bit wider. It appeared he couldn’t hide his feelings in his music as well as he thought he could.

  “Uh huh.” He grunted without commitment. He urged Lexi on without meeting her eyes.

  “You had some special inspiration for that one, didn’t you?” She knew the answer, it seemed frivolous to Alex to even ask. “I hate Ryan too.” She declared quickly before Alex could answer the question.

  “I don’t even know him.” Alex interjected shortly. He leaned back against the car and looked up, past the yellow light and attempted to find a star or two.

  Lexi snorted a bit. “You aren’t missing much.” She twisted up her mouth. “It might be true that you don’t know him, but you know how he treats Ri. That alone is reason enough to hate him. You’re new you know? You’ve seen it for all of two months. Unfortunately, Sam and I have seen it for years.” She frowned and sighed. “She’ll be so close to finally walking away and somehow he always sucks her back in. She’s totally deluded. She’s not real with him, not herself you know?” Alex nodded though he really couldn't say one way or the other as he’d never seen them together. “She holds her tongue a lot around him--”

  “Riana can hold her tongue!?” Alex laughed quickly.

  “Exactly!” Lexi exclaimed with a chuckle. “But it’s true, she’s not genuine and I try to tell her he can’t truly love her if she doesn’t show him who she really is.” She paused and locked her eyes on Alex. “She’s herself with you.” Alex’s eyes shot up to hers and Lexi swiftly added on, “And Derek and Matthew.” Alex nodded. They stood in silence for a long moment. “Well, should we get the princess to bed?” She giggled.

  “We shall.” Alex laughed. He followed Lexi back to the hotel, with sweet, softly snoring Riana in his passenger seat. Shortly after they started to drive Ri tossed a bit, reached out and found Alex’s arm. She grabbed it, pulled his forearm to her face and snuggled into it. She breathed soft, hot air against his skin. Riana gave a little murmur and smiled in her sleep. Alex sighed. Dammit.

  Alex was amazed by how deeply Riana slept. Alex picked her up again out of the car and carried her through the hotel, acutely aware of the perplexed expressions on the few people scattered in the lobby. He carried her into the elevator and down the hall to her room. All the while Riana’s heavy, rhythmic breathing assured Alex she was still asleep. Alex looked around her room and couldn’t help but chuckle a bit when he noted he wasn’t the only one with a sock issue. Except with Riana it wasn’t just socks; she had jeans, pants, skirts, dresses, shirts and shoes strewn all over her room. Alex gently laid her down on a clear spot on her bed and whispered a “goodnight” in her ear.

  “I can’t believe you’re encouraging this.” Derek accused Matthew after they got back to Derek and Alex’s condo. “I have a bad feeling about this.” He concluded.

  “How so?” Matt asked. “About the girls? I’m pretty sure they’ve proven their trustworthiness.” Matt knew that wasn’t at all what Derek was talking about, but he thought Derek was just being overprotective.

  “Seriously Matthew, don’t play stupid. You know exactly what I have a bad feeling about. I think they’re both getting into something messy.” Matthew sighed as Derek sat down at the kitchen island.

  “First of all, I’m not stupid.” Matt snapped. “I just realize they’re both adults D. And they’re friends.” Matt's mind added on; Friends that couldn’t hide some obvious attraction, but friends nonetheless. Matt grabbed a cold beer from the crisper in the fridge. It was Derek’s turn to sigh. “Okay, fine, you might be right. They might be playing with some fire here. But I just don’t think either one will push it right now. We have to trust them.” Derek glared at Matthew. The moment did not pass without Matthew noticing. “Okay, I get it, you don’t trust her completely with him. But if you don’t trust her, you have to at least trust him D.”

  “I do.” He relented softly. “And I do really like Ri, Lexi and Samantha.” Matthew grabbed a glass out of the cupboard, poured a shot of whiskey and handed it to Derek.

  “Good, because I have a feeling they aren’t going anywhere.” Matthew lifted his beer to Derek in a toast. D tipped his glass ever so slightly to Matt’s beer and swallowed it quickly. Matthew sat down across from him and breathed deeply. He wanted to let Derek know the reason he trusted Riana so much was because he knew her, that he had known her for years. He just wasn’t sure if that particular moment was the best time. The sound of a key in the door jostled both Derek and Matthew from their thoughts.

  “Wow, that was quick.” Derek jested as Alex tossed his keys to the granite counter with a clang. Matthew shot Derek another stern look.

  “What?” Alex questioned. “Ri’s hotel actually isn’t far from here, and the lady sleeps like a damn rock so I just got her to her room and came back. Did you expect me to stay or something?” Alex looked confused as he ambled around the island to sit next to Matthew.

  “No, Alex. We just know how you two can talk and we figured she would have woken up and y’all would get to talking again. That’s all.” Matt explained quickly before Derek could say something stupid.

  Alex chuckled a bit. “Yeah, she is a talker, isn’t she?”

  “She always has been.” Matthew noted offhandedly before he even realized. Both Derek and Alex looked at him, questions passed over their faces.

  “Always?” Derek asked. “We’ve known her for what, almost two months?”

  Matt looked down at his beer. There went his plan of perhaps saving the information for a later time. “Yeah...about that…” He started. “I know it was a long time ago, a really long time ago, but do you remember the necklace I used to have? The black and red one? And you know how it came from that fan who always wrote me? The one all the fan club staff knew to pass along to me? Well, her name was Riana.” A bit of clarity started to appear in Derek and Alex, but confusion still lingered. “I just had a
feeling, you know? That it was her.” Matthew rambled faster than he typically did. “I didn’t want to scare her right off the bat though so I waited to confirm. Then today, when she and I went to get drinks, it all came out. Riana is my Riana. I mean, she’s the one I knew all those years ago. It’s unbelievable, but it’s really her. All these years later.” He finally took a breath. “So I know her. She’s always been a talker. Her letters always drew me in, it was like I was there with her, living her life, keeping up on everything…” He trailed off, then looked at Derek. “Maybe that’s why I trust her so much.” Derek and Alex stared at him, both of their mouths agape as they tried to absorb it all. “I mean, you really get to know someone when you get a letter every few days for three years.”

  “Seriously!?” Alex blurted. “She wrote that often? Damn.”

  “She struggled Alex, a lot. If you think it’s hard to hear her talk now about everything she went through imagine how hard it was on her when she went through it. It seemed I was all she had at that point.” Matthew frowned.

  “Wow.” Derek whispered.

  Matthew perked up a bit, “You know she and Lexi have been friends since they were 13? It’s so cool to see her now and think back on silly stories Ri had told me about her. So it’s almost like I knew Lexi too before we met.” Derek and Alex still seemed shell-shocked. The sudden friendship with all of the ladies was hard enough to understand, but to tie it back to 1997 was, well, ridiculous.

  The groovy beat of Derek’s phone pulled them away from Matt’s endless rambling. “Speaking of.” Derek laughed as he answered. “Hey Lexi. No, we’re still up. Oh yeah, that sounds good….Sure. Okay… We’ll meet you there at nine then. No problem. Bye Lexi.” He set his phone down and yawned. “Alright, well I’m going to head to bed since we are now apparently having breakfast with Lexi and Riana before they leave tomorrow.” He grinned.

  “Sa-weet!” Alex hooted as he grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and bounded up the stairs to his room. Matthew smiled after both of them, then moseyed towards the guest room he occupied when in New York with them.

  Chapter Seven

  Bad Day

  Monday, July 24, 2006

  “Son of a bitch!” Matthew yelled as he browsed the forums of the D.M.A. fan club website at his desk in the office.

  “What!?” Derek commanded as he left his own desk and rushed over to Matt’s. Matthew’s mind spun. This is not going to be good. No, not good at all. Both Matt and Derek took in the pictures and the questions along with them.

  “Who is this with Alex!? It certainly isn’t Kim.”

  It certainly wasn’t Kim. The image was Riana, peacefully asleep in Alex’s arms, with Lexi beside him. There were more pictures that followed; of them at breakfast, walking along the street, pictures of Alex and Ri laughing hysterically.

  “I’ve seen her before. They were in Chicago together.”

  “Who is the brunette with them?”

  “Did Alex and Kim break up?”

  “I wonder if Kim knows…”

  On it went. It was taking on a life of its own. Matt and Derek knew it would be only a matter of time. “Dammit.” Derek grumbled. Of course, this wasn’t the first time the members of D.M.A. had been pictured with other women, and the fans frequently blew things out of proportion. Then again, they weren’t typically seen with other women, asleep in their arms, with a silly love-struck look on their face. “We have to do damage control. Now.” Derek demanded. Matthew nodded and passed his laptop to him. Before Derek could start they heard Alex upstairs.

  “Dammit Kim, she’s a friend!” He bellowed. Derek and Matthew looked at each other, they knew they were too late. “It’s not like she was a secret. I told you about her! Rebecca told you about her!” A slight pause and Matthew looked at Derek, worried. “You’d think after all these years you’d be used to stupid posts on the internet Kim.” Matthew could only imagine the verbal assault Kim was laying on Alex. The look on Alex’s face was easy to decipher, and Kim was no idiot. Derek could practically see the end of the road coming, like a brick wall magically placed in front of a speeding car. There would be no stopping this. It would be ugly, and painful.

  Alex stormed into the office and straight to Matt’s desk, as if he knew what they were looking at. “Okay, fine, I’ll look at the damn picture, but I was there, I’m sure I know what was going on.” Alex stopped next to Matt, but Matt didn’t dare make eye contact with him. Alex opened his mouth, presumably to call Kim out on this unfounded freak out, but then he closed it as his eyes fell upon the look on his face as the still version of himself gazed at Riana. He knew he was caught. He turned around and silently left the room as Derek and Matt caught snippets from Kim’s end of the phone. “...done Alexander...believe...I… stupid.”

  Matthew’s pocket began a relentless vibrating and he looked down to see his wife’s name and picture. He took a deep breath, he knew that somehow he would get in trouble for this. Being as Kim and Tabitha, his wife, were best friends he was sure Tabitha expected him to keep Alex in line and to prevent any pain to Kim. He slid his finger across the screen and answered.

  “I’m so done Alexander. I can’t take this anymore. I honestly thought I could trust you.” Alex was tired of fighting with Kim. She had proclaimed she was done at least a dozen times since he answered her call fifteen minutes ago. He tried to explain he was friends with Riana and nothing was going on. She wouldn’t believe him. She continued to say it was so “obvious” there was more. Alex tried to tell her about Ryan and how he and Riana had been together for years. “Then I hope she’s ready for the shit storm he’s going to bring her too.” was her reply. They went in circles, nothing Alex said calmed Kim down and he was beginning to think perhaps she was right. Maybe this was where it was supposed to end.

  “I’m done fighting Kim.” He sighed, defeated. “Maybe it is too much for us. Maybe it’d be better if you didn’t have to worry anymore.”

  Silence.

  “Are you serious?” She snapped. Before Alex could answer she screeched again, “Are you fucking serious!? I can’t believe you would just throw this all away like that!”

  “You’re the one that keeps saying you’re done!” Alex fired back.

  “But you aren’t supposed to just accept that. You’re supposed to want to make it work!” Alex heard her voice break and he knew it was time.

  “I don’t want to make it work Kim.” There. Done. Alex felt as if a huge weight was lifted from his chest and he could finally breathe.

  “You’re serious.” She gasped.

  It wasn’t a question, but Alex answered anyway. “Yeah, I am. I’m sorry Kim. I just don’t think it’s going to work.”

  Kim’s next words were cold. “No. You aren’t sorry.” She hung up. Alex sat there for a moment, alone in his room and stared at his phone. A beautiful picture of Kim looked back at him while “call ended” blinked.

  “Come on Ri, answer the phone.” Lexi urged as she paced her office. There weren’t remnants of a fire or explosion literally in front of her, but the internet had blown up with images of them from the night at the studio and of the next morning at breakfast. Lexi knew Riana was probably oblivious to it all at this point, so she figured she should be the one to clue her in.

  “Hello my dear, sweet Lexi!” Riana chirped when she finally answered. Yep, totally unaware. Lexi swallowed the panic that clenched her throat.

  “Hey honey. Say… are you near your laptop?” Lexi asked cautiously.

  She heard Riana shuffle in the background. “Um, I can be.”

  “Okay, when you get to it, go ahead and open up DMAfans.net or TMZ, or EOnline, whatever one you want.” Because it was all over the place.

  “Okay…?” Lexi knew Ri was confused as she heard the the keys and the mouse click. “I’m pretty sure if there was something important going on with the guys Alex... would... have… called.” Lexi knew she found the pictures. “Dammit.” Riana uttered.

  “Yeah.” Lexi s
ighed. “I figured maybe it’d be best if I were the one to let you in on the fact that apparently the whole world knows about you and Alex.” The moment the words passed by her lips she knew it was the wrong choice in words.

  “There is no ‘me and Alex.’” Riana quickly corrected. “There is a me and Ryan and there is an Alex and Kim, but there is no me and Alex.” She growled. Okay, definitely the wrong choice in words.

  “Okay, Ri, I get it. I just… thought you should know...about this. Whatever this is.” Lexi muttered carefully.

  “This…” Riana started. “This is a friend, carrying another friend because she obviously can’t hang with the big boys all night.” She gave a light laugh, in an attempt to diminish the weight of the moment. “I mean, it’s not a big deal. D.M.A. fans are crazy Lex, you know that.” Lexi could tell Riana wasn’t going to admit to noticing the look on Alex’s face. She decided not to push it. “But…” Riana sighed. “Do you think I should call Alex?”

  Lexi didn’t know. It could help or it could intensify the whole situation. “I don’t know Ri.” She admitted softly. “Maybe I’ll call D, test the waters.”

  Riana agreed and Lexi assured her she’d call back and let her know how she thought they should proceed. Lexi hung up and sat down in front of her computer. She looked again at a picture that should have been absolutely adorable, but had caused drama instead. Lexi scrolled through her phone contacts, down to Derek and hit talk.

  “You saw it.” He assumed instantly when he answered. Lexi was thankful she didn’t have to break the news to him too.

  “Sure did.” She closed her eyes. “I didn’t even think, D, that there might have been someone around.”

  She heard him take a deep breath. “Lexi, there’s always someone around. It’s something that we’ve known for years. You’re...new. You don’t think the same way. It’s okay, we know this wasn’t malicious.” Lexi felt her shoulders relax. The last thing that she or Riana wanted was for the guys to think they purposely caused this situation. “Of course, it’s not your fault Alex can be read like a damn book.” There was a sharpness to his tongue and Lexi realized maybe all wasn’t as okay as he claimed.